The Home of Golf

The wife and I began planning our trip to the United Kingdom almost 2 years ago when we decided that we wanted to go to the Olympics.  We had to register about 18 months in advance for the right to buy Olympic tickets, then go through the lottery process for the tickets themselves.  We decided we wanted to go for 2 weeks, but after learning how expensive London was going to be we decided to spend about 10 days touring around Scotland beforehand to keep our actual time in London a little shorter.

It was just the two of us traveling, and the wife is not exactly a golfer.  Obviously I wanted to see some of the renowned courses when possible, but the only golf that I planned was at Turnberry, just a few days into the trip.  I didn't bring my clubs, figuring it wasn't worth it for one round and would definitely be too much to lug around everywhere we were going.  2 days after that amazing experience, we arrived in St. Andrews, "The Home of Golf."

And the wife, in her infinite wisdom, said to me, "Well obviously you have to try to play."  Now would be a good time to mention that I love the wife.

View from our hotel room (Best Western Scores)

There are 4 ways for the general public to get on the Old Course at St. Andrews:

• Book a tee-time 1 year in advance
• Enter the "daily ballot," which is drawn 48 hours in advance and requires at least 2 players to register; this accounts for about 50% of the available tee-times
• Pay 2-3 times the regular cost for the "Old Course Experience," a VIP-type organized tour that includes transportation to and from the course, a caddie, your greens fee, and a guaranteed tee-time (run by unaffiliated resellers of many of those year-in-advance tee-times)
• As a single golfer, you can approach the starter on the day of play to see if there are any two-somes or three-somes available to join; it is recommended that players seeking this option arrive at the starter's hut "as early in the morning as possible"

The weather forecast was excellent (65 degrees, sunny, light winds), and obviously I wanted to play.  On the other hand, I didn't want to spend a day of our trip waiting around the first tee just hoping I might get out.  I decided to head down at 7:15am, and if it looked promising for a morning tee-time I would try to play; if not I would bag it and we'd maybe do one of the tours of the course that are run in the late afternoon.  I refused to get my hopes up.

So at 7:15, without breakfast or coffee, I put my golf shoes on and wandered the short distance from the Best Western Scores to the starter's shack.  I was surprised to find a relatively young guy, probably in his 20s, friendly and chipper -- for some reason I expected a long beard and a cranky attitude.  There didn't appear to be any line, so I just walked up and asked, "Any chance of a single getting out this morning?"  The starter flipped open his tee-sheet, looked back at me, and said, "Do you have a handicap card?"

Quick aside: The Old Course requires a handicap of 24 or less to play, and must be backed up with a handicap card sponsored by their home course.  I had already preloaded mine on my phone for easy access.

I showed my card and he started jotting things down.  "I'll get you out before 9:00," he said.

Here's how I know I really hadn't gotten my hopes up: I didn't believe him.  "Really?"

"Yes.  Do you have clubs, or do you need to hire?"

"I need to hire.  Should I do that right now."

"Yes, go now, and let me know when you get back," he said.

I quickly called the wife to let her know it was on, and scuttled off to the St. Andrews Links Clubhouse (which is a past the first green, adjacent to the Himalayas putting green), and -- still not 100% convinced that this was really happening -- I obtained a set of Callaways.  After getting back to the 1st tee I was informed that I should putt around on the practice green for a bit.  Which I did.

View from the putting green of the 1st tee, 18th green, and R&A Clubhouse

And then, at 7:50am, the starter approached and said, "Mr. Paul?  You're in the eight o'clock group."

So yes, it was really happening.

I introduced myself to the 3 others in my playing group -- an American from Phoenix whose wife has family that lives in St. Andrews (and, unfortunately, whose name I have forgotten), and two Scottish brothers named Paul and John, "like the apostles."  Paul was a clean-cut, short-ish guy with a pure swing; John a bit taller with a pony-tail, and not as much of a golfer.  But John apparently used to work at The Links, and a few holes into the round I learned that he actually is the writer of the course guide I was provided on the tee!  (That did come in handy several times.)

Before we go hole-by-hole, I want to say a few things about the course in general.  I played the yellow (middle) tees, which measure at 6387 yards (though, as was the case at Turnberry, the measurements are to the front of the green and therefore by US standards the course would be over 6500 yards from those tees); the Old Course does have an official USGA rating of 71.4, with a slope of 129.  It's a par 72 consisting of 14 par 4's, and just 2 each of par 3's and par 5's.  And it is unlike anything else I have ever played; fairways are so closely cropped that they blend in to the greens, and the turf is "firm and fast," which leads to quite a bit of roll out after every shot -- many times with undulations that funnel balls toward the 112 perilous bunkers.  14 of the holes have massive greens that are shared between 2 holes, with the front 9 pins marked with white flags, and the back 9 with red flags (since many of the fairways also run concurrently, yardage markers on the course are similarly red or white to indicate which green they are referring to).

The Old Course is a true links course, not just in the proper golf definition of "links" (close to the sea, sandy soil, etc), but also because each hole is truly linked to the next -- you putt out on the green, and then take about 5-10 steps to the next tee, usually with no discernible difference between the tee box and the closely mown fringe around the green.  That makes it a perfect walking golf course -- and, of course, no carts are allowed.

This is hallowed ground, and I don't want to forget one moment of my time there.  So here are the details:

HOLE 1: BURN (355 yards, par 4)

The First, seen the night before my round at sunset

Unlike my round at Turnberry, I strangely didn't feel any nerves standing on the first tee.  Maybe it was the fact that I wasn't really expecting to play, or maybe it was the fact that on the face of it, the first at the Old Course is about as inviting a tee shot as there can be.  With the 18th fairway running alongside the first, there is an ample 100 yards of closely-mown turf.  The only trouble is out-of-bounds right over the fence that marks the border of the course, and 255 yards down the right side the Swilcan Burn cuts across the fairway.  With all that room to the left, only an idiot would bring any of the risk into play.

My tee ball stopped literally 2 inches short of the burn on the right.  Sigh.

The pin position was front left, which forces you to flirt again with the burn if you want to go at the flag.  I took the more conservative route and played a 3/4-wedge to the center of the green, and then 2-putted for par.  SCORE: EVEN

HOLE 2: DYKE (395 yards, par 4)
The 2nd hole is far less inviting than the first -- instead of wide open fairways, there is a narrow chute between two fescue-covered dunes.  About 200 yards out the fairway widens where it connects to the 17th fairway for a bit, but Cheape's bunker awaits at 245 yards if you aren't careful.  I hit 3-hybrid trying to find the wide area and avoid the bunker, and ended up on the far left side of the 17th fairway (safely).  From there green was obscured by a pyramidal mound, but I was able to find the middle, and 2-putts yielded a second par.  SCORE: EVEN

HOLE 3: CARTGATE (OUT) (337 yards, par 4)
Named for the kidney-shaped bunker on the front-left of the green, this is a classic (or perhaps the classic) risk-reward hole.  The shortest route to the hole is littered with classic links-style contoured hills, and 3 pot bunkers are hidden within the valleys; the safe tee shot is out to the left, but then you bring the Cartgate bunker into play.  I elected to hit driver to try to carry the shorter pot bunkers, but popped it up instead (that worked, too).  From there I had a sand wedge in to the green, and again managed a 2-putt par.  [The lesson, by the way, is just hit an easy 5-iron off the tee next time.]  SCORE: EVEN

HOLE 4: GINGER BEER (411 yards, par 4)
The 4th is very similar to the 2nd hole, with an initial tee shot framed by fescued mounds out to a wider landing area, this time followed by a very narrow pipe of fairway up to the green.  I pulled a 3-wood and didn't quite clear the dune on the left of the fairway.  My lie was decent, but my contact was not, and the 2nd shot found the next set of fescue up ahead -- and that ball was not found.  After a drop and a flop, 2 putts meant double bogey.  SCORE: +2

HOLE 5: HOLE O' CROSS (OUT) (514 yards, par 5)
The shorter of the two par 5's on the course, players are instructed to aim at the "Spectacles" bunkers off in the distance.  I hit driver left into some fescue, and, honestly, it was a bit of blur from there.  I think it took 2 shots to get out of the tall grass, then came up short of the green on the next one, and couldn't get up and down.  Anyway, I made a 7, and I think I tried to forget it.  SCORE: +4

HOLE 6: HEATHERY (OUT) (360 yards, par 4)
The tee shot is blind on this short par 4 over a large mound with tall "heathery" fescue.  Bunkers guard both sides of the landing area, including the famed "Coffins" bunkers on the left.  I layed-up with a 4-iron safely down the middle, then stuffed an 8-iron inside 10 feet, but sadly missed the birdie bid.  SCORE: +4

HOLE 7: HIGH (OUT) (349 yards, par 4)
One of the much talked-about areas of the course when the Open is played here, the 7th and 11th holes criss-cross one another, and players have to be careful not to hit into each other.  To make matters worse, the safest line on the 7th is actually directly at the 11th green (which is a par 3).  I hit 3-wood pure, right toward the 11th as instructed, and nearly ran it all the way to the Hill bunker that sits in front.  From there it was an easy pitch up onto the severely left-to-right sloped green, and 2 more putts for par. SCORE: +4

Sample from the excellent yardage guide -- with advice from my playing partner, John!  The kit provided by the starter also includes a detailed green map that indicates the specific hole positions for that day.

HOLE 8: SHORT (154 yards, par 3)
One of just 2 par 3's on the course, played slightly uphill to a crested green front that is massive (a shared green with the 10th hole, it's 48 yards deep and nearly twice that in width).  According to the course guide, "it can require a wood or a short iron, depending on the strength and direction of the wind."  When we started our round there was virtually no wind, but by this point there was a little bit of a breeze in our faces.  I went with 7 iron, and hit it directly at the stick, and it disappeared just over the crest, lost to view.  I thought it had a chance to be real close -- even had a few butterflies wondering if it might be in.  It was not; I had about a 20 footer coming back up the hill, and ended up with par.  SCORE: +4

HOLE 9: END (289 yards, par 4)
The 9th and 10th are nearly twin holes, and serve as the prototypes for short reachable par 4's the world over.  There isn't a lot of trouble on this one -- just two pot bunkers sitting in the middle of the fairway at 195 and 225 yards out.  I took those out of play with 3 wood, but pushed it a bit and ended up in some light rough next to the 10th tee.  From there it was a bump and run, and another 2-putt par.  SCORE: +4

HOLE 10: BOBBY JONES (311 yards, par 4)
As I said, this hole is almost identical to the 9th, with 2 pot bunkers in the middle of the fairway landing area.  Though a bit longer than 9, it played about the same because of the light wind in our favor here.  I again hit 3-wood, and this time pulled it a bit into some rugged swales off to the left side of the fairway, which left me short-sided to the pin.  I tried a delicate pitch and ran out well past the hole (more onto the "8th" side of the large green), leaving probably 60 feet for birdie.  I left that one about 8 feet short, but did make the follow-up.  SCORE: +4

HOLE 11: HIGH (IN) (164 yards, par 3)
"The shortest par 5 in golf" is the tongue-in-cheek term used for this classic par 3.  Played across the 7th fairway to an elevated green with a false front, almost every miss is funneled to one of two bunkers -- "Hill" on the left and "Strath" on the right.  I hit 8-iron and just barely carried the Strath bunker -- enough to get on and hold the green, though that left a demanding downhill right to left putt.  I started it a good 15 feet right of the hole, and it nearly went in, just skirting by the cup on the short side.  Tap-in "eagle" then, right?  SCORE: +4

HOLE 12: HEATHERY (IN) (304 yards, par 4)

A roller-coaster fairway hides the 4 bunkers that force an exacting tee shot to a landing area that only affords about 40 yards of safety, making this essentially a hole comprised of two short par-3’s.  The largest of the bunkers is called “Stroke,” as in “it’s gonna cost you a stroke if you hit into it.”  I mis-read the yardage guide (looking at the white tee distance, I thought I had 217 yards to the farther bunkers instead of just 205, and hit 4-iron right into the trouble.  It was then that I had a true “St. Andrews moment” – up against the 3 foot face of one of the smaller pot bunkers, I was forced to play backward.  Had a smile on my face the whole time.  From there I hit the back of the green, and 2-putted for bogey.  Most fun I ever had making bogey.  SCORE: +5

HOLE 13: HOLE ‘O CROSS (IN) (388 yards, par 4)

Trouble again awaits in the middle of the fairway with the aptly named “Coffins” bunkers sitting between 190 and 215 yards out in the widest part of the fairway.  I carried those with 3-wood, but ran into the light rough right of the fairway, leaving just about 100 yards into the front pin.  The green here is massive, a double-green that runs head-to-head (instead of the typical side-by-side) with the 5^th hole – front to back it’s 60 yards deep.  My pitch mark was right at the stick, and I had about 12 feet coming back.  Birdie.  SCORE: +4

HOLE 14: LONG (523 yards, par 5)
One of the charms of the Old Course is that everything has a name, and this hole features many of the famous stopping posts.  The landing area known as the "Elysian Fields" is guarded by a collection of bunkers ("The Beardies") short and the "Benty" bunker long, as well as the out-of-bounds fence on the right.  The second shot requires you to navigate the "Kitchen" and "Grave" bunkers.  But all of that is meaningless compared to "Hell" Bunker:

Hell Bunker, 14th Hole, The Old Course

Two comments about the Hell Bunker: (1) it's so massive it didn't fit inside a landscape picture on my iPhone, and (2) you can get a good perspective of how fearsome the lip is by looking at Paul up against the face, who isn't tall enough to see over it.  I'd estimate that he is a low single-digit handicapper, and it took him 3 shots to get out.  

I played a somewhat different hole, hitting driver way left, across the 5th fairway and behind a bit of gorse.  I chunked the next one, then played up to the beginning of the 5th before hitting a wedge short and right of the green.  From there I wasn't able to get up and down, and ended up with an unsatisfying 7.  SCORE: +6

View from behind the 14 green (the white 4th flag can also be seen on the right on this shared green)

HOLE 15: CARTGATE (IN) (391 yards, par 4)
Speaking of eponymous landmarks, the target area on the 15th is between two large mounds referred to as "Mrs. Grainger's Bosoms."  One can only imagine how famous Mrs. Grainger was around town.  Smart players will lay up to the wide part of the fairway about 220 yards out, but I foolishly hit driver and ended up amongst the tall grass on the left.  I had to punch out from there, and it was wedge-putt-putt for bogey.  SCORE: +7

HOLE 16: CORNER OF THE DYKE (345 yards, par 4)
Another famously named obstacle awaits just 178 yards off the tee in the "Principal's Nose" bunker, which juts out into the fairway from the left side.  I hit 3-wood well past that, leaving just a sand wedge into the green.  2 putts and a par on this relatively basic par 4.  SCORE: +7

HOLE 17: ROAD (436 yards, par 4)
Perhaps the most famous par 4 in all of golf, this was the time I had butterflies on the tee.  The drive is the well-known forced carry over the old railroad sheds next to the Old Course Hotel -- all of which is out-of-bounds.  Assuming you take the direct line over the corner, it's 192 yards of carry, but then the fairway is narrow and runs slightly left to right.  From there a long iron is required into the most treacherous green I've ever played (and probably that exists) -- narrow but 51 yards deep and angled from right to left, with the road (and out of bounds) on the right and back, and the impossible Road Bunker guarding the left approach.  Being completely honest, many (or most) of the par 4's at the Old Course are relatively easy, providing you can avoid the bunkers.  But this hole is an absolute nightmare.  It's what makes the Old Course not just an historic course, but a true Open Championship course even today.

View from the tee, The Road Hole

I went with 3-wood, and though the initial line was good, it started leaking a little right, and being blind I had no idea whether it was going to be okay or not.  I decided to hit a provisional (although after I hit the 2nd one a veteran Old Course Scot on the 16th green informed me that the first one was "definitely" in play).  After we rounded the bend the first one was -- as promised -- just fine along the right side of the fairway, though still about 200 yards out.  If that wasn't bad enough, the pin position was back left (i.e. over the Road Bunker), which meant the only valid play was to the front right of the green, leaving potentially a 100+ foot putt.  I hit 4-iron just about perfectly; good enough, in fact that the spectators up near the green started applauding... and then, for the first time in my life, I felt like a tour pro when the cheers turned to groans.  I could only assume that it had run through the green, and potentially was on the road itself.

The Road Hole Green, with casual pedestrians and spectators always nearby

In the end, it was even worse than I thought -- in the very narrow strip of grass between the road and the out-of-bounds wall, which meant I had not much space for a backswing on a very delicate chip.  I ended up catching that one a little thin, and ran through the green...then did the same coming back the other way, then putted once from the fringe, and finally made a testy 6 footer for double bogey.  Blech. SCORE: +9

HOLE 18: TOM MORRIS (361 yards, par 4)
The reverse of the 1st hole, with a wide-open fairway that is as inviting as can be.  The Swilcan Burn crosses the fairway but too close to the tee to really come into play; crossing the Swilcan Bridge, though, is a true right of passage that was surreal.
There are 5 obstacles to success on the final inward hole: (1) Granny Clark's Wynd, a road that crosses the fairway 250 yards out and is considered an integral part of the course, and therefore the ball must be played as it lies if it comes to rest there; (2) the "Valley of Sin," the deep crevasse that lies in front of the green and swallows almost every errant approach shot; (3) the green itself, amongst the course's most undulated, and referred to as "the most often three putted green in golf; (4) out-of-bounds all along the right side, which only a fool would bring into play with all the room out to the left; and (5) the fact that you're playing the 18th hole at the Old Course with a small gallery almost always watching.  Amongst my foursome, we brought all of those obstacles into play.

The approach on the 18th, with the R&A Clubhouse in the background

I'm the idiot who hit his drive OB right.  And not just a little bit right, but actually more than one street to the right.  Long gone.  Second shot was, naturally, right down the middle.  
The other American in the group hit his drive smack dab in the middle of Granny Clark's Wynd.  He "played it as it lies," and hit a fantastic shot into the center of the green.
My second tee ball was just a few yards behind the low-handicapper of the two Scottish brothers, Paul, about 80 yards from the green; I tried to hit the same shot I hit back on the first hole, a 3/4 pitching wedge, but didn't account for the slight breeze in our face and came up short -- into the Valley of Sin.  
It was then that I saw one of the most remarkable things I've ever seen on a golf course.  From 75 yards out, Paul putted, running through the crests and swales, down through the Valley of Sin, and back up onto the green, easing in pin-high, just about 5 feet right of the stick.  The very fact that such a shot is possible is what makes the Old Course great; the fact that he did it in such a fashion was just amazing.
I putted up from the Valley but didn't put enough "oomph" behind it -- fortunately enough that the ball didn't come back to my feet, but I still had about 12 feet left.  I pulled that one, and had to settle for triple-bogey 7.  [Paul made his putt, probably the most remarkable and memorable birdie I've ever witnessed.]  SCORE: +12

My putt from the Valley of Sin

FINAL ANALYSIS
To recap my day: not knowing if I would be able to get on the Old Course at St. Andrews, I went down to the starter's hut at 7:15, and ended up teeing off at 8:00.  I played with the writer of the course guide.  I was 4-over through 13 holes before falling apart a bit down the final stretch (including +5 on the last 2), finishing with a respectable 84.  It was sunny, warm, and almost windless.  Oh, and the round took just under 4 hours to complete, and felt as casual as any round I've every played (with a few exceptions).  

Beat that.  I'm sure I never will.

"The Nicklaus Pose," Swilcan Bridge (taken later in the day)

The Ailsa Course

At about 8:00pm on July 29th, Fred Couples made birdie on the 18th hole of the Ailsa Course at Turnberry to win the Senior (British) Open Championship by 2 strokes.

38 hours later, with the grandstands and TV towers still up, I made par on the 18th hole of the Aisla Course at Turnberry playing out of the fescue.  Not quite the same, but I'm not sure which one of us was more exhilarated.

But let's not get ahead of ourselves.  If ever there was a round that required the blow-by-blow, this is it. (Warning: This will probably be a very long post.)

JULY 30TH, 12:30PM
The Wife and I arrived at the Turnberry Resort, driving down from Glasgow.  It was a beautiful day -- sunny, warm (for Scotland), and of course with a bit of a breeze coming off the Firth of Clyde.  We had a few activities planned at the resort for the afternoon, but at about 4:30pm we made our way down to the clubhouse and pro shop.  Because the course was essentially closed for the day (to allow a handful of corporate sponsors of the Open their chance to play), there was not a lot of activity.  After clearing it with the pro shop, we were permitted out to walk the course and take some pictures (some of which you'll see below).  I'm certainly not the first person to say this, but Turnberry is an amazingly beautiful golf course.  It would be hard to convince me that it's not the most beautiful course.

After ensuring that my rental clubs and caddie were all arranged for the morning (plus a little shopping in the pro shop), we headed back up the hill to the resort for dinner.

Before moving on, just a quick aside about the golf-related features of the resort itself.  On the grounds in front of the resort, there is both a 18 12-hole pitch-and-putt course and an expansive putting green.  Both are free to use for all, and clubs are provided by the bellhops.  Given our somewhat compact schedule we didn't get a chance to take advantage, but man is that awesome.

JULY 31ST, 5:50AM
My alarm went off, and I woke up.  This is significant because it means that unlike my usual mornings of golf rounds that I have been anticipating for months, I actually slept the night before.  A few minutes later, breakfast arrived at our room, and by 6:15am I was out the door.

The weather was absolutely perfect -- about 55 degrees early in the morning, with a forecast for 65 and sunny, with -- get this -- virtually no wind.  Here was the view out our window:

I arrived at the pro shop just as it opened, and got set up with my rental set (Taylor Made R11 D/3W/5W, 3-hybrid, and 4-SW irons), then headed quickly over to the range to hit a few.  I already knew from my experience getting fitted for my home set that I was going to like the irons, and I hit the 3 wood fairly well, but the driver I had a lot of trouble controlling.  My driver has an extra-stiff shaft (that's what she said), and I had a hard time finding the rhythm (also, that's what she said) with a shaft that was just "stiff" (obviously, THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID).

Back over by the putting green I met my caddie for the day, Lee, a nice local guy in his 40s who had been caddying there since he was 16.  He was on the bag when Mark Hayes set the course record with a 63.  I figured I should trust him, which meant I mostly kept my yardage guide in my pocket for the round.  It was just he and I for the day -- I wasn't paired up with anyone else -- and that meant it felt like the course was exclusively mine.  (And yes, that was truly awesome.)

JULY 31ST, 7:00AM
"Now on the tee, from USA, Scott Paul."

(Okay, that was in my head.  But it was loud and clear.)

Let's take a quick overview of the course stats.  Playing from the Championship Tees (which, of course, I did since they were still out there from the Senior Open), the Ailsa Course is a 7217 yard par-70, which carries an unofficial USGA rating of 76, with a slope of 134.  Also, FYI, Scotland's courses are generally measured from the tee to the front of the green (whereas US courses are generally measured to the center of the green), which means you can add another 200 yards or so to the total yardage for comparison's sake.  There almost no water intrinsic to the course (just a small "burn" that comes into play on the 16th hole)...but there are 65 bunkers, and every fairway is treacherously lined with fescue and, often, gorse.  It is a championship course in the truest sense.

HOLE 1: AILSA CRAIG
Almost certainly the easiest hole on the course, number one is a gentle dog-leg right par 4, just 354 yards.  A lay-up iron short of the first bunker on the left leaves just 125 yards into the green.  Lee handed me the 4-iron, and with a few butterflies churning I yanked it out left of the bunker.  Fortunately that was an area where the galleries had been standing just a few days before, and so the fescue was trampled down and I had a clean shot.  Unfortunately I hit that a bit fat, and ended up short of the green-front bunker.  From a tight lie I hit a good pitch over the bunker, leaving about 15 feet for par.  Alas, 3-putts though led to double-bogey.  I hate 3-putts, even when they're on a severely sloped green on an Open course playing with a rental putter.  SCORE: +2.

HOLE 2: MAK SICCAR ("MAKE SURE")
The course guide uses the phrase "trouble lurking in almost every direction" to describe the 2nd.  So that's not very reassuring.  I hit the driver, and in what would be a theme for the day, hit a hard hook into the fescue.  I had to punch out from the there and didn't advance it very far, but my next shot found the center of the green, and I was able to 2-putt for bogey.  SCORE: +3.

HOLE 3: BLAW WEARIE ("OUT OF BREATH")
This 489 yarder that plays into the prevailing wind (hence the name) is the first par 5 on the course... oh, wait, that's right, it's a beast of a par 4.  I guess it does play slightly downhill.  I hit driver left again, and didn't even get out of the fescue on the first attempt, then just barely out on the 2nd.  My fourth shot was into the pot bunker on the right edge of the green, which meant I had my first "British Open Bunker Shot."  On Lee's advice I played well right of the hole to give myself a better chance of getting out since I was fairly close to the riveted face of the bunker; and I am proud to say that I put it just where he told me.  Despite that bright spot, after 2 putts I had a disappointing triple bogey for the hole.  SCORE: +6.

HOLE 4: WOE-BE-TIDE
The first hole on the course that runs along the sand dunes bordering on the Firth of Clyde, this is a beautiful 168 yard par-3 with massive bunker front and right of the slightly elevated green.  Lee handed me 7-iron ("It's this one, boss."), and I hit the center of the green, then just missed my first chance at birdie.  SCORE: +6.

HOLE 5: FIN ME OOT ("FIND ME OUT")
My favorite hole on the course, this is a beautifully framed 479 yard gradual dogleg left that runs between 2 high sand dunes.  The green is protected by 4 pot bunkers, and any wayward shots quickly find thick rough and gorse brush.  As Lee said to me on the tee, "Now the fun begins."

5th Green, Ailsa Course

My drive was again left, finding the 2nd fairway bunker.  "Take your medicine, boss," was all Lee said as he handed me sand wedge, and I popped it back out onto the fairway.  From there, though, I chunked an iron, and my next shot barely caught the back of the green.  2 more putts, and 2 more shots over par. SCORE: +8.

HOLE 6: TAPPIE TOORIE ("HIT TO THE TOP")
A long (231 yard) uphill par 3, this was playing a bit shorter since the tee box was advanced forward.  It was still over 200 yards and uphill, but to my surprise Lee handed me 4-iron.  ("She'll get there, boss.")  I trusted him, and he was right.  ("Nice shot, boss.")  Par.  SCORE: +8.

HOLE 7: ROON THE BEN' ("ROUND THE MOUNTAIN")
Providing the first good view of the famous lighthouse, the 7th is a gorgeous hole.  It's the only par-5 on the front, playing at 538 yards.  The green is obscured from the tee by a big mound that sits 240 yards out on the left side, and the proper tee shot is either over that mound or to the right of it between the fairway bunkers.  I hit what finally seemed like a good tee shot shooting the gap of the fairway, but the "fast and firm" surface had no interest in holding my ball, and it rolled all the way through the fairway and into the thick fescue.  I never found it.  After a drop, I hit a fat shot that left me about 80 yards in to the elevated green, and a wedge and 2-putts yielded a bogey 6.  SCORE: +9.

7th Fairway, Ailsa Course; the "mound" is seen on the left.

HOLE 8: GOAT FELL
My drive on the 8th was way right, actually in the 15th fairway -- it would be the only time I hit my second shot from any fairway all day, even if it wasn't the proper one.  My approach was just off the green on the right, and I took Lee's advice to bump and run with an 8-iron before holing a 6-footer for par.  SCORE: +9.

HOLE 9: BRUCE'S CASTLE
I'm going to let the pictures do the talking here.  But suffice to say, this is the most beautiful hole I've ever played, and probably ever will.

9th Teebox, Ailsa Course; the Ailsa Craig is seen in the background

Teeing Off on 9

My drive here was just right of the fairway -- but just right means thick fescue.  I got out fairly clean and ended up just short and left of the green.  Another 8-iron chip left just 5 feet for par, but I lipped out.  SCORE: +10.

HOLE 10: DINNA FOUTER ("DON'T MESS ABOUT")
Nearly matching the 9th for awe-inspiring beauty, the tee shot requires a course over the Firth of Clyde to a devilish fairway that has two pot bunkers directly in it's center, and further ahead the often-imitated "island bunker" (with a mound of fairway in its center).  I avoided all that nonsense in the center of the fairway by hitting a massive slice right.  This time I found a trampled down area for a clean swing, and my approach left just about 12 feet for birdie...which I left one revolution short.  SCORE: +10.

Tee Shot, 10th Hole, Ailsa Course

HOLE 11: MAIDENS
In comparison to the previous 2 holes, the 11th isn't that much to look at -- just a basic 175 yard par 3 with bunkers fronting both sides of the green.  But if you're smart when you're standing on the tee box you'll turn around and look back on what you just played:

View from the 11th Tee, Ailsa Course

I hit 6-iron straight into the bunker on the right of the green, again fairly close to the 4-foot riveted face. Lee's advice on this one: "Swing at it, it'll run to the hole."  I did, and it did, leaving just about 5 feet. Which I missed.  SCORE: +11.

HOLE 12: MONUMENT
A breather of a hole after a series of beasts, this is a fairly straightforward 447 yard par 4.  I just cleared the right hand bunker that sits about 260 yards off the tee, and for the first time all day found the shorter first cut of rough (which is only about 3 yards wide all the way around the course).  From there it was just a wedge into the green, and 2 putts for a relaxed par.  SCORE: +11.

HOLE 13: TICKLY TAP ("TRICKY LITTLE STROKE")
My drive here returned to the pull-hook form of the early holes, though in the end that ended up being the safer side.  I was back to the thick fescue, but was able to get a club on it and managed to run one up the narrow fairway chute, almost all the way to the green.  An nice up and down meant back-to-back pars for the first time all day.  SCORE: +11.

HOLE 14: RISK-AN-HOPE
Everything slopes to the right on this uphill par 4.  I believe, unless I'm mistaken, that my drive did find the fairway initially, but the slope kicked it right into the thicker rough.  Lee pulled out the wedge but then paused and looked at me before I took it.  "I can get a club on it," I told him, and he quickly switched it out for the 7 iron.  It felt like it was the hundredth time he had been my caddy at that point.  The ball came out clean, and settled on the right edge of the green.  2 putts, for a 3rd straight par.  SCORE: +11.

HOLE 15: CA' CANNY ("TAKE CARE")
A famously treacherous par-3 that plays over 200 yards and has absolutely no room for error.  The left side of the green is protected by 3 deep pot bunkers and heavy contouring, and off the right of the green is a 30 foot drop-off filled with 3-foot-high fescue.  I decided to give both sides a try -- my 4-iron tee shot was right of the green, and after about 5 minutes of searching we managed to find it about 3/4 of the way down the steep slope.  I was able to get more club on the ball than I thought and so the follow-up went over the green (and the bunkers), leaving either (a) a very delicate pitch back over the bunkers to the downhill slope back at the drop-off, or (b) an only-in-Scotland putt trying to utilize the contouring to funnel the ball around the bunker in my face and back to the green.  I chose *b* because when in Scotland, you do as the Scots do.  Lee was disappointed in the result -- I had about 25 feet left from the front of the green -- but I was pretty pleased that it ended up on the putting surface.  Suffice to say, 2 putts was the best I could do from there.  SCORE: +13.

HOLE 16: WEE BURN
Another well-framed hole, this time with nice views of the resort off on the left.  This has the only intrinsic water hazard on the course in the form of Wilson's Burn that runs in front of and to the right of the green.  My drive was into a trampled down area on the right of the fairway, and must have really hit hard because I only had a wedge into the severely contoured green.  This was probably the only time I made a bad lag putt all day, completely misjudging the speed and running about 15 feet past the hole.  I hate 3-putts.  SCORE: +14.

HOLE 17: LANG WHANG  ("LONG WHACK")
17 is the longest hole on the course (558 yards) and the only par-5 on the inward 9.  The tee-shot is semi-blind and requires about 170 yards of carry into a chute between two huge sand dunes.  I did not achieve this, hitting a pulled pop-up left that we never found.  After dropping in the fescue, I hit consecutive 8-irons to the middle of the green, then lipped-out what would have been a great par putt. SCORE: +15.

17th Fairway, Ailsa Course | Between the Dunes

HOLE 18: DUEL IN THE SUN
Named after the famous battle won by Tom Watson over Jack Nicklaus in the 1977 Open Championship, the 18th is a fairly straight-away 370 yard par 4 from the regular tees, but a sharp dogleg left 461 yarder from the championship tee box.  "Hit it to the TV tower, boss," said Lee, and I did, finally hitting a pure dead straight drive to the middle of the fairway.  Or so we thought; by the time we got out there the ball was nowhere to be found.  Perfect drives are not meant to be lost, and so we searched for about 10 minutes, with Lee finally coming across it well buried under some nasty gnarled rough.  I hacked at it with a wedge and actually almost ran it up to the green, settling just about 5 yards short ("That's a great oot o' dar, boss.").  I putted from off the fringe up the hill and left it about 10 feet short; but finally made a putt dead center of the cup for an immensely satisfying par on the last.  SCORE: +15.

FINAL ANALYSIS
Just a spectacular golf course.  85 from the championship tees with Open-level rough without hitting a single fairway?  I'll take that.  Three-for-three getting out of bunkers?  I'll take that.  I do feel like I cheated a bit -- the weather could not possibly have been any more perfect, and there was really almost no wind the entire round.  Definitely not what we're used to watching from the Open.  But I'm not complaining.

I do want to give a special thanks to Lee, who guided me around the course and without whom I probably would have shot 95 or worse.  Plus we finished in about 3 hours and 20 minutes, which is just about perfect as far as I'm concerned.

Ahhhh, Turnberry.  Ye will be missed.